I believe everybody has gone through a bad experience on being gossiped. However, interestingly, there are many gossipers who don’t notice themselves they gossip.
Japanese old saying goes 人の口には戸は立てられぬ. It translates “Anyone can start a rumor, but none can stop one”. This saying indicates the issue of gossiping has existed long time ago. I guess gossiping is just a very natural human’s habit.
I went through the bad experience of listening somebody gossiping. And the worst thing for me was that I knew the persons who were gossiped. They were not my close friends, but I knew them personally. They were always nice to me. I personally did not want to know any kinds of their personal stories, especially their private tough stories.
One time I took my courage and pointed out the gossiper to stop leaking others’ private issues. The person said to me that it was not gossiping. She believed it was okay for her to share the others’ stories with me.
I really disagree. Her friends talked about their private issues because they trusted her. Her friends never expected of their friend gossiping and spreading their private issues to other people. I wouldn’t feel comfortable if my friend spreads around my private issue to somebody, especially to somebody whom I know.
To me, gossiping includes talking anything about somebody else who is not at the place where the conversation is held.
I would like to share one of Eleanor Roosevelt’s Quotes.
Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.
偉大な人はアイデアについて話し、普通の人は物事について話し、つまらない人間は他人のことを話す。
Eleanor Roosevelt is absolutely right. Let’s focus on ideas. Let’s focus on our own. Let’s stop gossiping. Really, others’ issues are none of my business, and my issue is none of others’ business.
Here are my small suggestions.
When we hear our friends talking about their tough situation, let’s pray for their better situation, instead of spreading their private issue to other people.
When somebody starts gossiping about somebody else, let’s simply leave the person, or let’s be brave and tell the person, it’s not good to gossip, I don’t want to spend my time listening a gossip.
I believe when each of us keeps it in our mind not to get involved with any kinds of gossiping process, we can change the environment. Like always. Small baby steps will change the world.
three wisdom 