At the beginning of my daughter’s summer school in June, my neighbor offered us a ride to school. She gives a ride to her little boy to school. The little boy participates in the same programs as my daughter does.
We could have walked to school but I was happy to hear her kind offer. So, I respectfully accepted her offer. Since then, we have rode to school together every morning. I enjoy chatting with her.
We have known each other for years but we never had opportunity to chat.
It is fun to get to know her. Every day I get to know her little by little. It is like opening surprise gifts every day. It seems to me she has gone through a lot. That gives her lots of wisdom and knowledge. I always love to hear people’s real story.
***
She is 70 years old. I thought she is the grandma for the little boy, but my guess was wrong. She is a great-grand mother to him. She had her son at the age of 19. Her son also had two daughters at his young age of 20 and 21. Then, her granddaughters too had their kids at their young age of early 20s.
She takes care of her great-grand-son every day. The little boy goes to the school in next town, and the school does not offer the school bus to our area. So, she gives him a ride to and from school every morning and evening. It takes 30 minutes one way. Thus, she drives 2 hours every day for her great-grad-son during the normal school days.
She also has a full custody for her great-grand-daughter who just turned to 16 years old. Her granddaughter gave away her custody due to some drag issue.
She never talks about her husband. I guess she might have her son as a single mother in her young age.
I was amazed at her story. It sounds tough, but at the same time, she sure receives lots of love and blessings from her grandchildren.
***
She asked me if Japanese has a habit of spanking a child as discipline. I answered I don’t think we do. She mentioned they had in her younger days. She also mentioned “sadly some people still do.”
She witnessed one of her old friends used to spank her children to discipline. The children are now grown-ups and still don’t listen to others. She believes spanking does not work to discipline. She believes when an adult talks to a little child logically, with looking straight into their eyes, about the reason why they should not do this and that, small kids will fully understand. They don’t need to be punished in order to be discipline.
I agree with her. We don’t need to give any kinds of physical punishments to children to discipline.
When I heard my neighbor mentioning about physical punishment to children, I thought about myself.
I never hit nor spank my daughter. That being said, I was not a super nice mother all the time. I yelled at her when she was still a baby.
When my daughter came back home, I asked her if she remembers my yelling at her when she was a baby. She said she remembers. I apologized her for that. She said she accepts my apology.
Nobody can do it right all the time. We sometimes make a mistake as a parent. The important thing is we can make it up with our children to face to them and apologize to them sincerely. Then, we can change our attitude from the next time.
We cannot change our past. But at least we can change our presence. Changning our presence will change our future better. That is how we grow our mentality and spirituality day by day.
♬ Any feedback? (^^♪
three wisdom 