In my dream of this morning, somebody gave me a lily. It was just one lily, but its size and color was impressive. It was huge as the flower was the same size as my palm. The color was clear blue-ish purple.
I don’t know what the message of this dream, but I felt calm and relaxed.
***
Today my family and I attended at the annual Japanese festival in Tucson.
Last year when we attended for our first time, we enjoyed everything there. They had a Japanese drum playing, songs, dances, food stands, martial art demonstrations, and a mochi pounding demonstration.
Since this year was our second attendance, we noticed everything was pretty same as last year. We didn’t enjoy as the same way as last year. We kind of felt disappointed. If we were a performer, we would have enjoyed reconnecting with other performers and friends, though.
Right before we left the venue, my daughter and I went to the bathroom. On the way back to my husband, I saw in a far distance, one woman smiling and waving at me.
She approached to us and greeted me by calling my name. She looked familiar but I could not remember her name instantly. After several seconds of my thoughts wondered, I finally noticed it was my old friend in this land.
When my daughter was still a new born, one of my Japanese acquaintances set up a meeting with a Japanese woman. She was a new mom with a new born. Her first baby girl was born four months before my daughter. We met on the day and became friends. I believe she was 4-5 years younger than I.
We started visiting each other’s house once a week or so. For the first one month or two, I enjoyed spending time with them. But after a while, I started feeling some type of stress for spending time with her.
She was much more enthusiastic than me, when it came to making new friends and mingling with many other people. There was a Japanese community where 10-12 Japanese women gathered for a potluck lunch every month. After I attended it twice or three times, I noticed I felt uncomfortable mingling with many others. I gradually stopped attending any kinds of gathering. And that was how I lost contact with my old Japanese friend. Nobody was a bad guy. It was a natural process.
My old friend and I chatted for a while. Her family and she have lived in Tucson for five years. She was holding a new born who was recently born as their second baby. I didn’t know any of them.
Right before we ended our short catting, we looked at each other. We quickly felt we didn’t need to exchange our contact information. Even if we did, we would not contact each other. Our relationship was completely ended. There was no connection left between us, which was fine with both of us.
***
It was good for me to run into her at the festival. In the past years, I sometimes blamed myself for not keeping in touch with any of Japanese old friends on this land. But today’s running into my old friend clearly told me I did the right thing.
For me, human relationship and material items are the same in a way. I feel comfortable with only the necessary human relationships and items. I don’t want to feel heavy in a situation where there are a whole bunch of unnecessary relationships and items.
But of course, this is only my preference. You might have your own preference in terms of human relationship and material items. I believe the important thing is to know our preference and act accordingly, so that we always feel comfortable with what we have and what we don’t have.
As of now, I am feeling comfortable with what I have and what I don’t have. It matters to me.
♬ Any feedback? (^^♪
three wisdom 