We packed up our stuff and left my mom-in-law’s house. My mom-in-law kept on telling us that she would be fine and not to worry about her. It really sounded opposite. It sounded like her strong wish that she wants us to visit her as many as we can. We will definitely do so.

I drove for the first 3 hours and got very exhausted. My husband was feeling fine, so he took over the remainder of 5-hour-drive straight back home. I appreciate him for taking over today’s drive. If I were alone, I would not have made it back home.

For dinner we stopped by at the Japanese restaurant that we used to go. The restaurant used to have a variety of dishes, but they shrunk down the menu to simple ones only. Still, I enjoyed their food, especially Japanese white rice.

It was my dad-in-law’s funeral day. My mom-in-law invited a small number of family and friends at 10 a.m.

I woke up around 6 a.m. and started cooking vegetable soup and fried rice for the guests.

Starting around 9:30 a.m., the guests started showing up. There were my dad-in-law’s two sisters and their husbands and children, my dad-in-law’s two close friends, my mom-in-law’s two sisters and their sons, my brother-in-law and his two daughters, and us.

My mom-in-law opened the ceremony by greeting and thanking everybody. She asked us to come up front and say something about my dad-in-law. My dad-in-law’s twin sisters talked about my dad-in-law of his younger days. They shared many cute stories of my dad-in-law when he was still very small. It was very nice to hear many people talking about my dad-in-law. Everybody said all the nice things about my dad-in-law. He had been funny and always made people laugh. The most standing out attribute of my dad-in-law was his kindness to people. He was extremely generous and kind to people. I completely agree with everyone. He was very kind. He always tried his best to help people. While he was alive, he often said he wanted to be helpful.

During the graveyard service, I laughed a lot and cried a lot. While my dad-in-law’s sister was talking, it rained. My daughter felt the rain was like my dad-in-law’s tears. I agree with her.

It was a nice graveyard service. I am sure my dad-in-law enjoyed listening to everybody. I wanted to go up front and talk about my dad-in-law, but I was too coward to do so.

After the service, we gathered at my mom-in-law’s house and shared foods together.

In the afternoon, I suffered from exhaustion and headache and took a 3-hour nap.

At night my husband’s cousin visited us and we had a good time chatting.

I woke up normally and did my routine of jogging on the treadmill and preparing foods for my family. Now that my dad-in-law was cremated and the ashes were released, my mom-in-law wanted to have a grave yard service on this Thursday. My family and I packed up our items and departed to Navajo Nation.

My husband was exhausted from work, so I drove the majority part of the long drive. My eyes were still sore from the wild fire smoke and I had a headache, but I made it through. All of us are still exhausted.

My daughter had a dream of my dad-in-law. We were all in the hospital room. My dad-in-law was sitting on the hospital bed and crying. My mom-in-law was sitting beside of my dad-in-law rubbing his back and comforting him. I went to him and hugged him, then my husband and daughter followed. My daughter saw two buttons next to my dad-in-law. The buttons were blue and orange. My daughter pressed the blue button for my dad-in-law and he stopped crying. Next she pressed the orange button for him and it made him feeling happy. Then she woke up.  

***

In the afternoon I received a phone call from my mom-in-law. She said she already went to pick up the ashes and released the ashes at the family graveyard. She said she felt relieved. She also felt my dad-in-law is now feeling happy. I agree with her. My dad-in-law is now released and feeling happy. Happy journey back to the spirit world, my dad-in-law. We all love you all the time. We all miss you and wish you are with us. You know all of that, right? I look forward to seeing you again when my time has come to leave this physical world. Until my very last day, I will live my days fully on this physical realm. I promise you that I will do my best to fulfil my life missions on this Earth.

I had been sick for the past two days. The very first thing I did right after I woke up was to pray for my good health. I didn’t want to take a nap in the daytime. I wanted to keep being healthy so that I could finish up my to-do-list items. I was okay in the morning, but around 1 p.m., I started feeling sick again. I ended up taking a 2-hour nap again. I woke up with a phone call from my mom-in-law. She said my dad-in-law’s body has been cremating. She would be able to pick the ashes up at the mortuary office tomorrow. I asked her if she had somebody to go to the mortuary with her. She said she would be alright to go there alone. I wish I could be there for her to support her.

It was Sunday. I still feel sick with allergy-like symptoms from the smoke. I have many things in my to-do-list but could not do anything because of feeling sick. I needed to take a 3-hour nap in the afternoon again. It was 2-days straight. I hate being sick. I really hope I will be healthy tomorrow so that I will accomplish all the to-do-list items. I thought of my late dad-in-law. He must have been feeling the same way as I am feeling right now. He wrote down many items in his projects. He wanted to accomplish many items before he departed.

***

I noticed my daughter’s school is way advanced. Even though she is still at the 6^th grade, her math and social studies are for the first year at the high school in Japan and her science is for the third year of the junior high school.

I am still feeling exhausted. My eyes sting and itchy. I have been suffering from runny nose and sneeze. My husband’s cousin mentioned about the smoke from California wild fire. The news says many people have been suffering from allergy-like symptoms from the smoke. I needed to take a 3-hour nap in the afternoon.

At night I attended the Sunday Service hoping to receive any messages from my dad-in-law. But I was not picked tonight.

My husband got back to his routine work shift from today. He must have been still exhausted from the trip. I pray for his safety. And I appreciate him for going to work to support us.

My daughter has been intensely working on her school assignments. In the afternoon my husband received a phone call from my mom-in-law. The mortuary office was ready to cremate the body, but the doctor has not sign the necessary document. The cremation might happen on next Monday. We were all surprised for the news. Last time they told us it might take 2 weeks or so.

In the evening at 5 p.m., I talked with my Japanese friend on the phone. It was very comforting to talk with her. She told me that she had read the news about Navajo Nation in Japanese television news. I was surprised to hear that. They reported Navajo Nation has been having many deaths due to Covid and there were long waiting line for cremation.

I woke up in my own bed. I slept well last night.

It was a busy day after the trip. I washed all the clothes including all the sheets and blankets that we used during the trip. I washed shoes and sandals. I wiped off all the suitcase and cooler boxes with Clorox wipes. I also wiped off my car at the door knobs, steering wheel, and interior along with the trunk.

I noticed I had grown white hairs in these several days. My last hair dye was on May 10^th. I didn’t have outstanding white hair for the past three months. I recall my mom told me once that when she dealt with somebody’s funeral, she grew many white hair from stress. It happened to me. It has been really stressful days. My daughter helped me for henna hair dye. I appreciate her kind support.

In the evening my husband and I got a big argument.

At night I did a free flow mediation with the help of HemiSync CD. During the mediation, I talked to my dad-in-law in spirit. I shed lots of tears. I thanked him a lot for everything what he had done to me. He helped me a lot for bringing me in to Navajo culture. We started off our relationship from friendship and it changed into a family of dad-in-law and daughter-in-law. My dad-in-law often talked about starting a business together. We wanted to invite Japanese customers to our home site and share Navajo culture and teaching with them. I apologized him that we could not make it happen while he was alive. He told me he would support from spirit world by sending me the right people for making our dream happen.

I could slept well last night. I am glad that I could sleep through until 7:30 a.m.

We promised my mom-in-law that we would come back for the funeral once the creation is done.

I am glad we could drive back home safely.